Thursday, December 17, 2009

Presents, Pumpkin, and Plummer's Cracks

My love language is definitely not gifts. The whole process of gift-giving and receiving, especially at work, gives me anxiety.  All week long people have been coming to my desk with gifts of Christmas cookies, candies, and treats and I have nothing to offer.  Is it not written that when one brings you a gift, you give one in return?  For the love of expectations!

So I went to WalMart full of Christmas ambition.  I was going to bake tiny perfect loaves of pumpkin bread for my gift-giving coworkers.  Oh but why did I decide to go to the WalMart?  That was really stupid.

Everyone knows that WalMart at 6:00pm is full to the brim with bargain shoppers, plummers cracks, and screaming children.  I do believe that perhaps WalMart is always busy as such, but one can only guess. 

I had inspired plans of wrapping my pumpkin loaves-to-be in fabric and tying them with ribbon bows and handmade gift tags.  "Everyone will think I'm so clever!"  So I waited at the WalMart fabric counter for lady-with-crazy-hair in front of me to purchase multiple yards of hideous fleece for some unfortunate daughter.  Later, with red and white polka dots in hand, I set off to find ginger for my loaves.

Ever so patiently, I waited near the spices for the masses to clear only to discover that all the greedy bargain shoppers had snatched up the last of the ginger.  And the cinnamon, cumin, allspice, and nutmeg.  You'd think it was the holidays or something!  I decided that no one really likes ginger anyway (except my mother) and so I would do without.

And wouldn't you know it, WalMart was out of pumpkin too!!  Certainly I cannot make pumpkin bread without any pumpkin.  And here I gave up.  I called Kyle in a panic wondering what could I possibly get or make or do that would send Christmas cheer around the office and fool everyone into believing that I am a domestic queen??  I'm pretty sure I heard him roll his eyes through the phone.

So I left WalMart after an hour of inner turmoil with damaged pride, a box of assorted jams, and a package of truffles.  Merry Christmas coworkers, only two of you will be receiving gifts and I do hope you like jams and chocolates.  Maybe next year I will master office gift-giving at a more especially creative level. 


Jamie said...

I love your blog! I was at WalMart last night, sick, trying to get some cold medicine for Lexi. Why my silly husband wouldn't go for me is beyond me. I HATE WalMart at 6 at night!!!!! You could always make banana bread...

vickyj said...

*I have always had the gift-reciprocation blues. I have never been ready with a gift to exchange with the neighbor at the door or the co-worker at the desk. You can blame it on me. I didn't teach you to be prepared.
*I never go to WalMart for anything at anytime.
*I DO love ginger.
*I could have helped you with the ginger if you lived closer.
*I could have helped you with the pumpkin, too. I heard back in October that there was going to be a shortage of pumpkin because of crop failure. I stocked up. But, again, you don't live close enough.
*I would love to receive jams, truffles, banana bread.
*Someone said, "It's the thought that counts."

Abby and Jason said...

I heart plummer's crack and you :)